Eh

Sometimes, I have a million ideas and can just type some random blog post up at any moment without a headache. But that stopped a while ago.

Oh nooooooooo it’s gonna be on of those “I’m sorry I left for so long without notice blahblahblah I’m gonna start anew blahblahblah and more blahblahblah.”

Welp. Sorry.

I know I said sometime back I will try to be more consistent in blogging but lately motivation has been low. Like really low. Like zero kinda low.

And it sucks you know? Cause blogging used to be one of the biggest things in my life. I’d get so excited to finish up my work and get on the blog but now I’m just like “Eh it’s just blogging no biggie.” So I procrastinate writing a blog post halfheartedly and maybe one week later I’ll get something up. Who knows. I can even tell that I’m not the only one losing interest cause blog stats are dropping further everyday.

But the thing is, I want it to be a biggie. (welp not the biggest thing but you know what I mean) However, I just… can’t. Maybe I need more motivation than just from myself. I think I burned that one out a while ago. That little Starling energy I had a few months back is totally gone.

So. My 2019 in blogging was pretty much a fail. Or more like the second half. And this post, the first one of 2020 on this blog, is kinda trashy but you know what? It’s okay because now the mindset I’m having for this blog is that “I’ll write what my heart leads me to write.” Why force myself to do something I don’t wanna do, right? I don’t wanna throw this blog away, but I don’t wanna abandon it either. I guess sometimes I’ll just come in and write stuff and then leave so don’t expect me to pop in with a post every single week. Just a mini heads up heh.

This post was definitely depressing but hopefully after this rant everything will turn out just fine because my blog can’t always be cheery and smiley. That’s life, y’know?

School starts tomorrow and I’m semi-excited.

So yup, this post was all over the place and yup, it was sad and yup, I typed it up for you guys to know that I’m using this blog as an “I’ll come in sometimes, maybe I won’t” kinda thing. But no, it wasn’t a self-pity post, it wasn’t a post to get your comments or likes, or whatever. I’m just putting this here to remind myself if ever in the future I change and set the record straight so I won’t feel forced to do anything.

Therefore if you follow from now on, I might not thank you guys as often but just remember that I appreciate you all :)) Thank you for 583! Looking forward to 600 O.o I’ll also still be accepting tags and awards and blog buttons trading but I might not get around to doing them so quickly.

See y’all whenever I see y’all.